Discover your main quest by playing

In games

Every game has a main quest.

Save the princess. Climb that mountain. Defeat the demon lord. Save the world.

The main quest is the overarching direction of the entire game. It’s your reason for existing.

To advance the main quest, the game gives you a series of main quests: first find the village elder, then collect the three sacred artifacts, finally storm the castle. These are progressive. You complete one to unlock the next.

Then there are side quests: help a villager find their cat, gather herbs, enter a fishing tournament. These aren’t directly related to the main quest, but they might make you stronger or earn you some extra gold.

With a main quest, you know which direction to go and which monsters to fight.

Even when you’re wandering the map aimlessly, or getting lost in some side quest, you always know where to return and what to do next.

And the main quest doesn’t reveal itself all at once.

At first, you don’t even know what the main quest is. You just know you need to “reach the village.” Later you learn the main quest is “defeat the demon lord.” After finally beating him, you discover there’s an even bigger conspiracy behind it all.

The main quest unfolds layer by layer. You don’t need to know the final chapter’s plot while you’re still in chapter one.

In reality

Reality is an open-world game with no main quest.

No NPC runs up to you saying, “Hero, please save the world.” No quest log. No guidance.

So we borrow other people’s main quests: good school, good job, good partner, buy a house, save enough money, retire.

These are society’s default scripts. The problem is, many people complete these stages one by one, only to find there’s no happily-ever-after ending. Got the degree, still lost. Bought the house, still empty. Retired, still don’t know what life is about.

Because that’s not your main quest. It’s someone else’s.

Without a main quest, you can’t tell which tasks are main quests and which are side quests. Everything looks equally important and equally unimportant.

Many people get stuck here: “I don’t know what my life’s meaning is.” So they don’t move. They sit in the starting village, waiting until they figure it out. Or they just binge-watch shows and play video games, waiting for the world to come rescue them, the protagonist.

But your main quest isn’t something you figure out by thinking. It’s something you discover by playing.

Your main quest at 20 is different from your main quest at 30. Your main quest at 30 is different from 40. Main quests change. That’s normal.

The point isn’t to find the “correct main quest” from the start.

The point is to pick a main quest and start moving.

As you go, the real main quest will reveal itself layer by layer.

Discover your main quest by playing.

Player notes

I used to think my main quest was “achieve financial independence, retire early, never work again, and live happily ever after.”

So I set a main quest objective: earn one million dollars.

I spent a few years and actually did it.

Then what? Nothing changed.

My bank account had a few more zeros, but I was just as lost. No fireworks. No victory screen. No happily-ever-after ending.

I tried “retiring” for a while. Turned out, without work, I lost a lot of things. Lost social connections. Lost structure. Lost a reason to get up every day. I just stayed up late watching shows and playing games.

I started observing billionaires. They achieved financial independence long ago, but none of them are “retired.” They’re still working, still creating, still pursuing something.

They must have figured out something I hadn’t. If even they don’t think retirement is the finish line, maybe “financial independence, retire early” was never a good main quest?

Then what is?

Honestly, I’ve thought about this for decades and still don’t have it figured out.

Humanity hasn’t figured it out either. Some say religion gives meaning. Some say having children is the meaning. Some say creating is the meaning. I think it really depends on the person and what stage of life you’re in.

But one thing I’ve slowly come to understand: maybe the question isn’t “what is life’s meaning?” but “which direction do I want to go?”

A main quest doesn’t need to be the ultimate answer. It just needs to be a direction.

New Year’s resolutions often get stuck here too. This year I’ll exercise. I’ll save money. I’ll learn a language.

These goals aren’t bad. The question is: what do they have to do with your main quest?

If your main quest is “create,” then exercise might be a main quest objective to maintain focus. If your main quest is “become an athlete,” then exercise itself is the main quest objective. But if you don’t even know what your main quest is, these goals are just side quests floating in the void, with no motivation behind them.

That was me. For years, my New Year’s resolutions were things like “exercise three times a week” or “meditate for 30 minutes daily” or “build another app.” Predictably, I never followed through.

Part of it was habits and systems. But there was another reason: I never thought about how these goals connected to my main quest. They were just floating there, impossible to commit to.

Later I realized that while my capabilities and execution aren’t strong, I’m good at connecting existing concepts and coming up with interesting ideas. My current main quest is: “Share my interesting ideas with the world.”

With this main quest, these goals suddenly connected. To create more things, I need a healthy body and mind to stay focused. Exercise and meditation are no longer isolated goals but habits that support my main quest. Building apps and writing books are vehicles for expressing my interesting ideas. They’re main quest objectives.

With this connection, the motivation feels different.

Of course, this main quest is vague. I don’t know how to measure it. I don’t know when it counts as “achieved.”

But it resonates. Every time I think about it, I know which way to go.

Writing a book isn’t the ending. It’s just one main quest objective. Maybe in a few years, my main quest will change again.

That’s fine. At least for now, I know which monsters to fight and which direction to walk.

Leveling tips

□ Write down what you think your main quest is. Did you choose it, or is it society’s default script? Replace “I should” with “I want.” What you should do is usually someone else’s main quest.
□ Not sure if it’s the right main quest? That’s fine. Pick one that feels right and start walking. Update as you go. Your main quest is discovered by playing, not by thinking.
□ Observe the people you admire. What are they doing? That might point to the direction you truly want to go.
□ Once you know your main quest, think of three main quest objectives you can do now. Pick one and start.
□ Review your main quest once a year. People change. Main quests change. That’s normal.